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50 Cent Named One Of “50 Most Loathsome New Yorkers”

50cent

The New York Press has released the 2nd annual

"50 Most Loathsome New Yorkers" issue.

"In defining the word ‘loathsome,’ we cast

a wide net and caught all manner of frauds, blowhards and bloodsuckers,"

the New York Press wrote. "Sometimes the people displaying this behavior

are representative of unseen forces and larger groups; other times they’re self-contained

symbols, their loathsomeness obvious."

Rapper 50 Cent is the only rapper to make the

list this year, checking in at number 48.

"Look at you, up from the underground with

mix tapes and DVDs in hand, riding the coattails of Jam Master Jay’s murder

into the TRL ether," the article reads. "We probably could have handled

the Teen People cover, but the Teen People centerfold was off the cliff: You

posed in a bulletproof vest for a glossy magazine aimed at 12-year-old girls.

Did you know that the press release for your Grammy performance had you next

to Celine Dion and Richard Marx? Time to go get fitted for a pair of MC Hammer

pants and bring your act to Foxwoods."

Bruce Ratner, the multi-millionaire developer

led the purchase of the New Jersey Nets with a group of investors that included

Jay-Z, checked in at number 49.

"It would be nice to have a pro team back

in Brooklyn," The New York Press quipped. "It would also be nice if

wings sprouted from our shoulders and we could fly like pixies. Wannabe Batman

villain Bruce Ratner pays no heed to the heinous traffic mess a new arena would

create for Flatbush and Atlantic Aves. He speaks nothing of the people forced

out of their homes, nor of the enormous amount of public dough needed to fund

his private enterprise, nor of the dozens of buildings being condemned at ludicrously

undervalued prices—even as his nearby, failed Atlantic Center Mall depends

on City Hall back-scratches to pay rent. A true visionary, Ratner can only see

his multi-billion-dollar dream extending heavenward. The people of Brooklyn

are just diorama props for investor display, pouring soda and serving hot dogs

at minimum wage."

Donny Deutsch, the D in Russell Simmons’ defunct

advertising venture D-Rush, also made the list.

"The chief of David Deutsch Associates says

he only hires ‘Jews, chicks and fags,’ and is known for tearing off his shirt

during office hours and saying—without irony—things like, ‘I can kick

the ass of any CEO in advertising!’ Think Steven Seagal meets Charlotte Beers.

The "Elvis of Advertising" has been dabbling with a CNBC talk show

and even told New York magazine that he’d consider running for mayor. Qualifications:

good at selling sh*t, does lots of pushups. Look out, Bloomie.’

The Hilton Sisters, Lenny Kravitz, the cast of

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, Moby, Sarah Jessica Parker, Donald Trump, Howard

Stern, Rupert & Lachlan Murdoch all made the list, while former Mayor Rudy

Giuliani landed at the number 1 spot.

 

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