As an entertainment attorney for over 15 years, I’ve had the chance to
work with and represent major recording artists especially with respect to the
negotiation of their recording
agreements. In any recording agreement,
the record company will usually pay the recording artist an “advance,” that is, a sum of money that
is ostensibly supposed to be utilized by the Artist to “live on” while
recording their album. Unfortunately, some artists spend their advance
unwisely. The following are 10 things
you should not spend your artist advance on (in no particular order).
1) THE MERCEDES BENZ / BMW / CADILLAC CAR DEALERSHIP:
You’ve worked
hard to get that record deal and you
deserve to treat yourself but you
don’t need to get that brand new
Benz, Caddy or BMW first time out. Get a
pre-owned Benz, Caddy or BMW that
has reasonable monthly payments. Why get the brand new 2007 whip? A lease may be the way to go since you can
probably write the expense off and trade the car in when your album goes
double-platinum. However, if you’re
still living with your mom, I suggest you get an apartment first (see #5) and
cab it for a while.2) GETTING “ICY”:
As Kanye says,
“avoid the ‘conflict’ diamonds” and stay away from the jewelry store until
you’ve sold at least one million records (at
which point, everyone will be giving you free jewelry!) Also, avoid diamond encrusted “grillz” and
make an appointment with your dentist first!
BAD BREATH CAN BE A CAREER KILLER!
3) “POPPIN’ BOTTLES” WITH YOUR WHOLE CREW EVERY DAMN
WEEKEND:
Spending TWO
HUNDRED AND FIFTY ($250.00) DOLLARS on a bottle of anything at a club is just plain retarded. Better to buy your crew a round at the bar.
Your wallet won’t leave the club with a “hangover.”
4) GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB EVERY WEEKEND:
Not only are you
spending money buying drinks but you’re also paying for lapdances and still
going home alone!! Can you spell
“T-R-I-C-K”??
5) BUYING A HOUSE:
Usually a good
idea but not with your first advance unless record labels were in a bidding war
to sign you and you got a million dollar advance!! In that
case, move to Atlanta
and buy a crib. Matter
of fact, buy two!! Otherwise, get a nice
apartment in a neighborhood that’s
on the come up!
6) BUYING CLOTHES & JEWELRY FOR WOMEN OTHER THAN
YOUR GIRL:
You got a record
deal and an advance – you haven’t
sold a record yet! Look out for mama and
your kids (if you got’em) but avoid the groupies and golddiggers ‘cause it
can’t possibly be that good!!7) BUYING CLOTHES AND JEWELRY FOR YOUR “MAN” EVEN THOUGH
HE HAS 5 BABY MOMMAS:
Bet Britney
wishes she read this before dealing with K. Fed: Can you spell “P-I-M-P”?? Girl, it can’t possibly be that good!!
8) GOING ON A SHOPPING SPREE
EVERY WEEK:
It’s a fantasy
of most to be able to walk into the priciest store in the city and drop money
like it means nothing. An occasional shoe,
bag, jacket purchase is cool but blowing $20k in one store in one day when you
don’t even have an album out yet is retarded!!
9) PAYING EVERYTHING FOR YOUR WHOLE CREW:
Being down with
the crew is a good thing but don’t take it to extremes. It’s not your job to hire everybody in your
crew or to pay their rent, buy diapers for their kids, etc. Tell them to either keep their day job or to
get one!! This is not “Entourage” and
you are definitely NOT Vince!!
10) BUYING WEED OR ANY ILLEGAL MIND-ALTERING DRUGS:Unless you have
glaucoma or you’re a Rasta, it’s not a good look.
