The Last Word: The 2008 Illseed Edition

This is the first edition of the New Year, and I managed to force my way into the Last Word, which is usually a production of the Alternatives section of AllHipHop.com. Some people have considered me a bit alternative so I offered my services to get out of the day-to-day of rumor writing. (I promise, […]

This is the first edition of the New Year, and I managed to force my way into the Last Word, which is usually a production of the Alternatives section of AllHipHop.com. Some people have considered me a bit alternative so I offered my services to get out of the day-to-day of rumor writing. (I promise, no typos either!)

Anyway, this week has been insane…as usual.

R.KELLY & WAPA

Earlier this week, AllHipHop ran a review on the ’07 year that spoke directly about the highs and lows that have faced R.Kelly. Now, I am not saying that R. Kelly is any sort of pedophile, but the state of Illinois seems to have some notion that he slept with an underage girl. There is nothing worse than legal “hate.” This is based on a tape. Anyway, I know most people have love and adoration for the Kellz-Man and they should delve in and join in the discussion. Hell, cuss me out. I’m still mad at Kellz for stealing Aaron Hall’s style!

On a side note, a new crew has created a new organization called WAPA (Whoop A Pedophiles A**). If found guilty, R. Kelly better be careful!

FYI: BEYONCE DOES NOT LOSE

OK, so last year Beyonce busted her ass when she fell. Aside from that, does she ever really lose? No, marrying Jay-Z is not hardly losing. Beyonce’s legal team announced this week that she won an appeal on copyright infringement charges levied by the co-writers “Baby Boy,” the Grammy-winning song. Basically, a woman submitted a demo to Papa Knowles, but a court revealed that the song was already damn finished with she gave the cassette to the family. I say tape, because to my knowledge, nobody does demos anymore. The lawsuit included Beyoncé, Jay-Z, Scott Storch, Robert Waller (EST, the Acknikouos One!) and a bunch of corporations.

Beyoncé said, “It’s unfortunate that we had to endure this long legal process but I am hopeful this decision will allow all of us that were involved to finally move on.”

KELLY’S NOT SWEATING BEYONCE

Just plain wrong. Popjustice.com asked R&B superstar Kelly Rowland if she wanted to be as popular as Beyonce. Of course, Kelly didn’t even try to diss her girl.

Classy Kelly said, “God creates different people for a reason. Everyone will have a different and unique journey, and my journey will be different from Beyonce’s and her journey will be different from Michelle [Williams’] and Michelle’s will be different from everyone else’s. I don’t think about it or worry that I’m not doing this or achieving that – people do that for me!”

Sure, she wishes she was as famous as Beyonce and so do I…wish Kelly was as famous as Beyonce. Not me…I’d never want that much fame and fortune…acclaim.

MARIAH SWITCHES TO A VEGGIE BURGER

Just when I thought Mariah was about to go in on Jennifer Lopez, she backs off a lie. Well, the rumor is the pair were going to be doing a duet, and the rumors were that Mimi replied she would prefer to be “on stage with a pig.” It might not be true, but it is gangster. Mariah Carey dismissed the whole mess saying, “This is just some Internet gossip, and it’s pathetic that people actually entertain the thought that this could be real. This is another sad example of two strong women being put against each other.” I am a loser.

STOP, STOP, STOP!!!!!!!!!

Arrrrrrrrrrrghhh! Will the entertainment industry stop giving each other an award every month? I mean, I am all for awards and watching stars perform, but at some point we have to do more. With that, I say that BET has a new awards show that will be honoring Alicia Keys, Tyra Banks, Dick Parsons, Maxine Waters, Dr. Cornel West and Janice Bryant Howroyd. Confirmed stars include Stevie Wonder, John Legend, Erykah Badu, Jill Scott, Wyclef Jean, Danny Glover, Kerry Washington, Vivica A. Fox and Hill Harper. These go-getters will pay tribute to Alicia Keys (who gets the Entertainment Award), Tyra Banks (Media Award), Dr. Cornel West, University Professor in the Center for African American Studies (Award for Education), Richard Parsons (Corporate Citizen Award), The Honorable Maxine Waters (Public Service Award) and CEO Janice Bryant Howroyd (Entrepreneur Award) at The BET Honors Awards this Saturday, January 12.

I take it back. This is pretty damn cool. I can’t even front.

STOP, STOP, STOP!!!!!!!!! PART 2!

Ray J. When will it end? I hope that this young brother can get it together and pull in the reigns. I don’t think he is a bad guy, but he needs to clean up some messes before he drops the new album, All I Feel. The album has like four entities: Shaquille O’Neal’s DEJA34 entertainment company, Ray J’s Knockout Entertainment and KOCH Records. Even DJ KaySlay is going to A&R the project. Rodney Jerkins will be doing some of the beats and expect guest appearances from Snoop Dogg, The Game, Lil Wayne and others. How is anybody going to get paid? Anyway, best wishes and a Kim Kardashian to you too.

NO SHAME: DIONNE WARWICK GOT ROBBED!

According to reports, Dionne Warwick was robbed of jewelry stolen from a Rome Hotel room. The legendary singer is touring Italy and was oout of the room preparing for a show when the goons broke into her room. They got away with over $100,000 worth of precious jewels. This included two diamond rings, a necklace, a Rolex watch and a pair of earrings. That’s just foul. There is a special place in Hell for these people. Cameron Diaz was apparently robbed in the same room of the same hotel about seven years ago. Stop staying there.

ALTERNATIVE NOTES

We recently published a story called “Say No To The VOCODER.” What is a Vocoder? It’s that damn voice box thing that T-Pain uses on every song. Snoop recently used it on his “Sexual Eruption” song and even Ja Rule leapt in!

R&B star Monica and hubby Rocko had a new baby boy on Tuesday. The newborn weighed in at 5 lbs., 6 oz. and 19½ inches long. Monica is still signed to J Records and is working with Missy and Ne-Yo on her next album.

Christina Aguilera is about to have a baby, but she is still busy. She is releasing a concert DVD based on a pair of shows in Sydney, Australia at the Acer Arena in July 2007.

I don’t know why anybody would care about this, but I will say it anyway. Brandy has gotten a new hairstyle to match her new frame of mind. Click here to see and interview with the new ‘do.

American Idol contestant Katharine MacPhee was dropped from RCA. Damn, another one bites the dust!Patti LaBelle and John Legend are the headlining acts for Hands On Atlanta’s first-ever Community Benefit Concert on Jan. 31 at Philips Arena. Nice!

James Brown’s prized possessions are being appraised and subsequently auctioned off. The Godfather owes money and the only way to pay the taxes in death is the sell stuff. What is being sold has yet to be revealed.

OUT!

That’s it for now. Somebody else is going to do this next week. I’m a busy man and they will be too…unless a woman writes it.