The Last Word: 'Twas the Night Before New Year's

AllHipHop Staff

What’s the deal? The end of the year is hours away and once again it’s that time again. With a decrease in the death of US soldiers in Iraq for 2008 and Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich naming Roland Burris to fill Barack Obama’s Senate seat, the year ends on another newsworthy note.And with that comes the second annual ‘Twas the Night Before New Years, another spoof on Clement Clarke Moore’s “The Night Before Christmas.” Shout out to Mr. Moore, whose story was the blueprint, Skillz for providing the inspiration for this with annual Rap Ups, Tyree for coming through in the 11th hour with the feedback and the sounding boards for making 2008 a year of memories.So here it comes…the final Last Word of 2008: ‘Twas the Night Before New Years‘Twas the night before New Years, when all through the houseAmy continued to ramble on about nothing, before she passed outCelebrations in the air, it’s high time for changeBeyoncé has identity issues, which is why she’s acting so strangeSasha’s so Fierce, mobilizing all the “Single Ladies”R. Kells got acquitted, so hide the pre-teens and babies The Pussycat Dolls were safe and sexy, all tucked in their beds,While visions of growing up danced in their heads Rihanna in her kerchief, Chris Brown in his custom-made capToo busy eating KFC and ducking the paparazzi – so much for taking a nap D’Angelo and Maxwell got the sign, now they’re back in the labMaking music for the masses, let’s hope it turns out fabT-Pain and Kanye at the piano, Auto-Tuning “Auld Lang Syne” to deathDoes anyone think Mariah and Nick’s marriage is on its last breath?Estelle chats with American Boys, Adele chases pavements outside International soul ain’t dead with Leona and Duffy taking the rideTerrance Howard reminisces for a minute, big money with Iron ManBadu discovered a New Amerykah, without changing the image of another rapper manThe night was going well, midnight had yet to strikeUsher wanted love in the club, so he decided to take a hikePleasure P had done Solange wrong, but she decided to stick it outBreaking up is too easy, so you gotta work it out (and a stick it out and a work it out and a stick it out…)Britney came back strong, Janet Jackson came up shortMigraines + label drama + baby rumors = disappointed fans and a cancelled tourBut lo and behold, there was knock on the doorAnd in came Bobby Brown, lookin’ like he fought a warDressed in Santa gear, was the current Head of StateFormer R&B “kaing” with a chicken wing in his mouth, looking for a mateNo willing queens in sight, but Alicia Keys was looking rightJennifer Hudson commands the spotlight, tonight is her nightEverything is cool with Anthony Hamilton, Robin Thicke and Mary J. got the magic for daysKeri Hilson gets turned on by Lil Wayne in so many different waysIt was the year of the Gentleman, Ne-Yo and Kells had beefMichael Jackson aligned with Akon, the overexposed hook-singing chief. But you can’t really be mad or hate on someone so paidMust be nice to lie about your background and still get laidThe green light goes up, John Legend has to goEva Mendes loves being nude, but she ain’t a hoI hear rumors about Playboy and Ashanti, a nude declaration on the horizon?The way that fellas love her, there’s no need for any hidin’And while Al Green laid it down, Obama was the bigger manHistory was made with three words, in short “Yes we can.”R.I.P. to Bernie Mac, Isaac Hayes, Eartha Kitt and Heath Ledger, who left us too soonRespect due to Tim Russert, George Carlin, Bo Diddley and Shakir Stewart while facing a new moonSay goodnight to ‘08, let’s raise a glass to the New YearNo matter what happens, be sure to stay blessed, productive and face the ‘09 without any fear!!