How to be a FAMOUS Rapper

After years of being a fan and over a decade of being in the industry, I've finally figured it out. There are only a few things to do to gain the status of "FAMOUS RAPPER" and they'll work at any level, be it local or across the globe.

1)Be generic. Have a look that anyone can have. You've seen it already. Big hats, icey white t-shirts etc.

2)Be really general but sound specific when you write your raps. Make it sound like you're dissing someone that everybody knows but don't actually say their name. It drives people crazy. Which brings me to the next tip...

3)Always have yourself near danger or in a conflict. Nobody wants to listen to some rapper rap about rap stuff. And tons of people want to go to a show where the show might not happen because the rapper you were or weren't rapping about shows up to fight.

4)Guns. This one is tricky. Any idiot can have a gun, but it takes a "FAMOUS RAPPER" to have a gun concealed in a place where it can be found by the police.

5)This is for those of you who are real serious about being a "FAMOUS RAPPER". You might feel it's a little extreme at first ,but let it marinate for a minute.


The trick here is, you have to get shot more times than the most "FAMOUS RAPPER" has been shot. The slug count is a little high right now so you might want to try and take the shots in places where you'll still be able to walk onto a stage.

Now, I know a lot of you are thinking..."this is wrong." Is it? Most people would like to believe that talent sells records...NO. Talent gets 6 years olds on Showtime at the Apollo. Big dumb clones who fight and shoot each other and need mediators to settle what can be settled with wit and tact sells records.