The X Fact(her) - Time For A Gangsta Green Thumb

AllHipHop Staff

I haven’t been food shopping in over a month.

I should grown my own food, but don’t. Jay-z said “dig a

hole” and maybe I should. Fill it with some seeds, sprinkle with water and some

TLC. I’ll be feasting on next season’s dinner in no time.

Seriously, I would love to eat fresh, organic produce every

day. A while back I came across this documentary about eight UK adults picked

to live in the monkey section of a zoo and eat the exact same diet as monkeys—all

fresh and raw fruits and vegetables. One man never saw cauliflower before. In

the end they all lost weight, felt better, had improved some of their medical conditions

and vowed to each healthier. There is

even an American documentary out about the same sort of thing.

Don’t know about you, but I’m not trying to live in a cage

in order to eat right nor am I willing to go broke buying overpriced organic

produce. This leaves me with another option: urban farming. As part of, I’m always looking for

solutions to problems facing the urban community. Perhaps bringing farming to

the hood will end the on-going battle for quality supermarkets and fresh produce

in poor communities as well as educating people about the power of Mother


Urban Farming

Living in the big city means more concrete than grass. Where

would I plant my seeds? Martha Stewart broke down how to create your own compos

heap but I’m not trying to be labeled the funky neighbor hording banana peels

and potato skins in a box.

During my weekly

radio show, the topic of eating healthy was raised. This got me to

wondering: At what point in society did we transition from farming our own

foods to living off of processed foods, McDonald’s and High Fructose Corn


You’d have an easier time finding bin Laden than you would a

boxed/canned or bottled food that didn’t

have high fructose corn syrup in its list of ingredients. Fun Fact: the higher

up in the list of ingredients something is on the label, the more that product

contains it. (i.e. If you pick up a bottle of apple juice and apple juice is

the last thing on the list, put it down! Buy a bag of apples and juice them


Perhaps farming in the hood would catch on if it was

marketed right. Folks would house their mini-gardens on their window sills.

Dudes on the block would start selling 100% Columbian dirt. When a fella asks

if you’ve seen his hoe, he really means a hoe.

Seed packages would be sold in corner stores and 7 Elevens and endorsed by Hip

Hop celebs with great taglines:

Jay-Z Apple Seeds: One Jay-Z apple a day keeps the hate away

Lil Wayne Zucchini: It goes with everything, and makes bread


Beyoncé Butternut Squash: So pretty, so yellow, so smooth

Notorious B.I.G. Eggplant: Black and ugly as ever…however good

for you.

I’ll rope up the ox and you grab the seeds

- CH

For the last seven

years, Chloé A. Hilliard has been a culture/entertainment

journalist, writing for the Village Voice, Essence, Vibe,

King, and The Source. In addition to writing The

X Fact(her), a hip hoppers humorous look at politics, she co-hosts I’m Sayin’ Radio, a

weekly talk show, and aspires to be a vegan. Learn more about her on