By now, most of you have made up your mind, lets be real. I mean, if you are voting, probably have not been swayed recently. If you are voting for Mitt, I have the ultimate swing endorsement ever: ME!
Now, illseed has not been very politically active in quite some time, and I fully intend to change that trend since the 2012 election is right upon us. I mean, what better time to jump into the fray than at the time of the actual election? I mean, some of you are going to argue that local politics are more important that re-electing Barack Obama. And, they may actuality be right. But, really…we can get another Congressperson or a Governor-type , can’t we? We may never seen another African American president – EVER. That’s a one shot deal, especially in our lives.
So, that said, there are a gang of reasons why Barack Obama should be selected, or elected. I know what you conspiracy theorists think too! Anyway, on the serious side, there are oodles of serious, contemplative and political reasonS the get the man back in the White House. But, I present some very trifling and frivolously frivolous reasons!
1) He’s the first and last African American President ever.
Barack Obama is the man! And these racist bastards are NEVER going to allow another man of his caliber get into office. Let me tell you how it’s going to go down in the future. There is going to be a kid to come along in the future or hE’s here already. “THEY” (and when I say they you know who I mean) are going to get the kid and destroy him before he ever gets to become the second Black president. This destruction can manifest itself by simply treating him the way the majority of Black people are treated.
2) A re-elected Obama can get GANGSTA!
Think about it. You want to get the cookie from a chick, but you gotta be all nice and sh*t to get the cookie. Well, America is that chick, and they are holding this big a$$ cookie called “re-election” in front of Barack Obama. Right now, Barack has to play it cool and abide by the rules, but after he gets selected, he’s going to start the actual revolution that we’ve always wanted! You know, the revolution where he can talk openly about Trayvon Martin! You know, where he can say “That-Chief-Keef-Does-Not-Rep-Chicago-Hip-Hop, B. My heavenly word!” Obama will then be able to tell these people to “Shut the hell up and do what I say, because, on my mama, if you don’t pass the Black Liberation Bill, these Negroes are going to riot on some Biblical sh*t.”
3) George Bush.
If you are voting for Romney, I want you to think about George Bush. You probably voted for him. And Bush was responsible for 9/11 and the economy and just about all evils that are going on in the world right now. Romney is George Bush’s StepBrother in politics. We don’t want another Bush in office, do we? Do you want to die? This guy Romney thinks he’s ready to run a country because he ran a company! Well, if you think he is, then you are ready to die. Even Biggie Smalls rethought that mentality.
4) Obama is TOO COOL!
I never liked any president before Bill Clinton. I know the man has the blood of Rwanda on his hands, so don’t crucify me on this frivolity. Dude was MAD COOL. He was so cool he thought he could get dome in the White House and get away with it. Anyway, there has never been a cooler president than Barack. Son killed Bin Laden, has a lovely family, struts when he walks, sons adversaries on a regular, and could be smashing chicks on a regular if he wasn’t such a great man. Dude is the epitome of finer humankind, and yet he’s not a shoo-in.
5) The other guy is a JERK FACED DOUCHE.
You know what? Above is the first time I have ever used the word “douche” in a sentence. I’m not fully clear how to use it, but it was the only word I could muster to describe the adversary of Barack Obama. Dude, the M.A.A.’s (Mormons Across America) are like, “Can you acknowledge our existence?” And, let’s not forget the 47% statement! This dude doesn’t care about White people, so you know he doesn’t care about anybody else! You can’t dedicate on America, and then think we are going to put your douchey a$$ in the White House? Come on, playa. Vote for Obama for all the good reasons that the talking heads said, and the fact that this dude is a complete, utter douche.
In all reality; sh*t is real. Get off your butt and vote.