0:02
welcome to allhiphop.com first and
0:06
belated I know I know I know what day it
0:10
to have you it's a week it was a week
0:13
that I turned 64 dude that is so big 64
0:17
is like no joke like you are not young
0:19
there isn't a part of me that is you
0:23
know I can't even pretend like when you
0:24
hit 40 or late 40s you're sort of still
0:27
pretending in your brain that you have a
0:29
you have a going on but by the time you
0:33
64 I'm like now so relaxed and so
0:39
embedded and uh inhabiting my my um my
0:44
next I just uh found Elaine Brown who
0:48
was an activist in the Black Panthers
0:50
and she's gorgeous and she's like in her
0:55
spectacular as are you and I love I love
0:59
huh as You Queen thank you but you know
1:03
as you get on and as you go through life
1:05
it's really important to have people to
1:07
model and to people who it's almost like
1:09
they gave you permission to be she had
1:11
on she has I saw this thing where she's
1:13
talking about her life and and her um
1:17
what sparked her into activism and she's
1:20
wearing leather pants and this like Yoji
1:23
Yamamoto shirt I mean she was just so
1:26
hip there was so much hipness and I
1:28
realized one thing thaten happens when
1:31
you when you do reach a certain age you
1:32
forget that you don't have to succumb to
1:35
frumpy or depression or whatever it is
1:37
that one would do you still got it going
1:39
on even if it's just for you you know
1:42
you gotta you gotta definitely find your
1:44
style and keep your style ever evolving
1:47
so it's appropriate you know what I mean
1:49
totally appropriate in the sense that it
1:50
inhabits who you are at that moment
1:53
because we do change every decade's
1:55
different and um the older and wiser you
1:58
get the more I don't know I think you
2:00
get really interesting but here we go I
2:04
mean there's different currencies when
2:05
you're young you have the currency of
2:07
beauty and youth and then when you get
2:09
middle AG you don't have that currency
2:11
and it's start and it's a hard
2:12
transition I think 30 to 60 is really
2:16
challenging 30 years old to 60 because
2:19
you're not young anymore but you're also
2:21
not exactly old so it's kind of a weird
2:24
it's almost like um it's like a I don't
2:27
know how to describe it maybe a twe
2:29
weird Zone it but now from 50 on and
2:33
you'll notice this you can begin if
2:36
you're smart you begin to sort of figure
2:38
out oh this is cool I don't have to
2:41
please anyone I can decompress from
2:43
colonialism and patrioty patriarchy I
2:46
can actually heal my soul from years and
2:49
years and years of rejection and not
2:52
fitting in like right now I'm in Mexico
2:55
to heal I'm in Mexico to take a break
2:59
from feeling the white gaze and to fully
3:07
uniqueness and to listen to my heart and
3:10
soul and to and to recover you know I
3:13
feel like for me personally my whole
3:16
life has been about understanding
3:19
rejection and that's a big ask and um
3:24
you know I think my soul when I was
3:25
designing this life with my guides and
3:27
angels I said oh yeah you know I want to
3:30
be born to a mother who can't handle me
3:32
who's going to put me into an orphanage
3:34
into a family that adopts me that
3:36
doesn't really want me but wants to use
3:38
me to keep somebody in line and um I
3:42
want to be highly intelligent but
3:45
yet but yet not academically or formally
3:49
educated so that I have to struggle with
3:52
that so I have to become an autodidact
3:54
oh and then I want to pick a career in
3:57
which basically the whole entire
4:00
industry is is geared to not ever ever
4:04
wanting me or my type so I want to want
4:08
in on that club because it's a dynamic
4:10
that I knew rejection is a dynamic I was
4:13
born into and so now at 64 I'm like okay
4:18
I get the note I get the soul note and
4:22
my being my entire being is saying I've
4:26
that I'm good I now now know that it's
4:31
an inside job love and that I have to
4:34
love myself and truly love myself and
4:37
not in that narcissistic crazy ass way
4:39
but I'm talking about where I get it
4:43
where I don't need to do anything I
4:44
don't need to impress anyone I'm not
4:46
looking for the approval and I don't
4:50
flying and uh it's working
